I guess this is how terrorists are born!!!

Hi

0700

It was a fine sunday morning. We left for the airport. We were scheduled to catch a flight to Delhi at 1200. The calm waters of the river (had to pass one on the way) gave no indication of what lay ahead. 20 minutes into the ride, our driver stopped and turned off the engine. It was supposed to be a SOP (Standard Operating Procedure) for all vehicles entering the aiport.

0730

A policman walked up to the car and asked us to unload our baggage, for screening. Screening at the security gate??? That is when it struck us that it was no ordinary airport. This was just the beginning of SOP at Srinagar airport. After 30 long minutes our baggage (including us) was cleared to enter the airport.

0800

30 seconds into the ride and off we unload at the entrance. Another baggage check?????? But then, this was Srinagar. My patience was running out. 45 mins later we were given the privelage of entering the Srinager airport. Another baggage check????????? They really were taking the terrorist thing seriously. "No hand baggage", said a handsome board. So we had to cram all our hand baggage into the suitcases.

0855

Finally, we were ready, except for two small boxes. The boxes contained cherries.

0900

They passed the baggage check.

0945

But could not make it past the check in counter. A friendly policeman came up to me and said I could not board the flight with the cherries. What was I supposed to be carrying? Miniature nuclear bombs???? I told him politely that the cherries had passed the baggage check. "You wont get past security check." I felt like dropping a nuclear bomb on his head. The terrorist in me was rising. I tried to explain that I could not possibly eat all of the cherries (couple of kilograms...). I asked him, politely of course, if I could meet his higher up.

1030

The higher up turned out to be a friendly gentleman. He said I could leave the cherries with the pilot. Perhaps he did not realize that a bomb is a bomb, whether with me or with a pilot. Or may be he thought I would eat a few cherries and leave the seeds on the floor so that I could trip a few people and send them to their deaths (if it was an air-hostess, i would have caught her ofcourse. Dumb fellow spoiled my chance). Having no choice, I had to trust the pilot to not eat my cherries (or spray the seeds on the floor. I'm sure he was also waiting for the air-hostess to trip over them).


1130

It was 1130 by the time the cherries were granted visa. 30 minutes more....29..........................................1 minute........................ - 1 minute........................ - 15...................... Still no call for passengers of our flight.

1200

Nothing happened :(

1245


It was - 45 minutes when the loud speaker went live. Our flight would be late. I don't understand how it could take them 45 minutes to realize that the flight would be late. Sheer commonsense says that when the flight never started from Delhi, how could it leave from Srinagar???? Maybe if they concentrate more on their pilots rather than on cherries, flights will be on time. The anouncement of free refreshments curbed the terrorist in me (for a while). The flight finally managed to leave by 1600 (along with the mini nuclear bombs).

1605

The babes in the flight (note the sarcasm in the word 'babes') did not even bother with toffees, or cotton. They took off even without the customary safety demonstration. Guess they were trying to catch up with lost time (and may be also add in a few extra trips. Does it get them a bonus? Not sure).

1800

Now I was waiting at the Delhi airport. Flight at 2000 to Chennai.
Surprisingly the flight was ahead of Schedule (may be they did not let it leave the parking bay at all, lest it get delayed)

2000

On board and off we go.


2130

The trip to Ladakh and Srinagar induced an irritation in my throat. Must have been the cold in Ladakh (Srinagar was burning at 39 degrees). I pressed the overhead button and a lady popped out of nowhere. "Warm water please". Off she went to get the glass of water. Without even thinking I gulped the glass (plastic) of water she gave me. Aarrrrrgggggghhhh!!! It was not warm water, it was freaking hot!!! This is what went through my mind, "B$*#%". I spit the water back into the glass (the female - I mean the air hostess had left by then). Is this how terrorists are made? One simple day. Return from an enjoyable trip was marred by some bloke who takes my 15 grand and then tortures me.

2135

Decision made. Never am I going to fly Indian Airlines again.

2245

Landed

2330

Reached home

2335 and continuing

I have never set foot into an Indian Airlines flight again.